Confession!

Confession: I always thought I would have at least two kids. I even gave friends of mine a hard time when they were thinking about being one and done. Ahhh how things have changed.

Right after my son was born I was "ready" to have a second. When others would ask how motherhood was I told them it was lovely and that I couldn't wait to do it again. Most of all I missed my baby belly and wanted a second chance to have my vagianal birth. Even when Riley was getting up every 45 minutes at night from months 4-8 I wanted another one. Then when my son was 11 months my husband lost his job and I knew we couldn't try right away. My plan had been to start trying when Riley was a year but we put that off. My husband quickly found a new job but it was a contract job. 6 months later he was out of work again, it was heart breaking for me. Mostly because I had just began to feel financially secure again. Just begun to think about a 2nd child again. Thankfully he found work quickly again and now has a job that he loves despite hating his boss.

It was at the time of the second lay off that I started thinking about being one and done. There are other things we would like to do and lets face it kids are exspensive. I often wonder if in another 6 months I will feel differently. I know I might but I also know the my head feels quite resolved that we are done. I just can't tell what my heart wants yet.